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Another Day in Paradise.
Life in Hawaii Before Us - Full Circle / Unexpurgated Edition
There were no missionaries, no whalers, no steamships, no hotels, no sugarcane and no pineapples.
Hawaiians had nothing to do but fight with each other’s tribe, eat fish, poi, taro and each other. The King kept his people occupied with various chores, such as making canoes, grass huts and Tiki Gods from logs using primitive tools such as a seashells and stones. All of this kept them occupied until we got here. We introduced them to our God. Our God told the Hawaiians not to make anything but money. They gave money to God in places that were called churches. The Hawaiians thought this was a great idea because they didn’t have to hack out canoes and Tiki Gods. They made money by picking sugarcane and pineapples to send to America. They loved the work because they didn’t have to hack out Tiki Gods and canoes any more.
Then the tourists and hotels came to Hawaii. Hawaiians began working for the hotels and tourists. That was a really easy job.
But all good things come to an end. The hotels and tourists are having them make Tiki Gods and canoes to show outsiders how Hawaiians lived in the old days.
And that’s how things go in Hawaii.
Humble Blackie
The Maui News - Expurgated Edition:
Lahaina News - Expurgated Edition
One Response to “Life in Hawaii Before Us - Full Circle / Unexpurgated Edition”
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June 23rd, 2008 at 7:56 pm
Blackie is the only semi-living Ali’i from the distant Island of Harlem. He came here in a large canoe with a swimming pool. He wears the tribal colors of the Halloween Archipelago. He is considered dangerous.Do not try to apprehend him alone. Call a waitress!
Good luck and be careful…
Kimo of Kalihi